Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
