your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
