i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize