I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i think i have two assholes
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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