ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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