Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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