whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
It's no shave November. This is our time.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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