Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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