friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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