So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
