He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize