come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
i now understand why vodka
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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