Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
It's never too late to be topless.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
