No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
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