thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2