you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
