you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
