I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
