sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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