Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
