Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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