remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
