is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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