Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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