I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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