maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
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E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
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The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
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