i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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