Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize