I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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