Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
