He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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