Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
