we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
