I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
