Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
