I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
