I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize