your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I want to be your penis for a week.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
