Porn is love you can see.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
