Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
