come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
