At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
