I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize