He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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