Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
