note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
