You were right. It hurts to walk today.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
