And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
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the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
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I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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