id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Randomize
