so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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